第2部分(第4/7頁)

ept　that　a　given　goal　may　be　out　of　our　reach　and　that　may　be　because　of　many　factors；　including　the　fact　that　we　may　not　have　the　talent　or　skill　needed　to　reach　the　goal。　Of　course　there　may　be　other　factors　in　operation　that　make　the　achieving　of　that　goal　at　that　time　impossible—　health　concerns；　financial　problems；　family　difficulties；　extraneous　stressors；　or　any　number　of　other　factors　acting　alone　or　together。　The　real　trick　to　self…acceptance　is　to　see　that　the　goal　is　unattainable；　at　least　for　now；　and　shifting　your　focus　to　acplishing　what　you　can　acplish　under　the　circumstances。　That　could　include　evaluating　your　original　goal　and　deciding　whether　or　not　to　continue　with　it。　It　also　means　giving　yourself　credit　for　what　you　have　acplished　and　what　you　have　learned　from　your　experiences。

The　parison　Trap

Judging　yourself　by　what　others　have　acplished　is　a　sure　way　to　lower　your　self…acceptance。　Have　you　noticed　that　you　never　pare　yourself　to　people　who　seem　to　aspire　to　less　than　you　do　and　that　you　always　chose　those　people　who　are　the　top　performers　or　the　most　popular　as　your　yardstick3　for　success？　Are　you　as　good　as　your　friends；　your　brother　or　sister；　your　parents　or　Joe　Blow？　And　how　about　trying　to　be　like　“normal”　people　are？　（And　who　or　what　determines　what　is　“normal”？）　Can　you　only　be　good　if　you’re　better　than　someone　else？　When　we　use　other　people　as　our　yardstick；　we　aren’t　taking　into　consideration　our　own　personal　limitations　or　ta